Just put and entry in on key points to having a successful relationship. those are just simple points but how many people can actually do it?As for me, i dun think i am even qualify to put that entry in, for my last relationship, it is true that i have some bad points, i tried to change, but i guess it is not enough, and when someone wanna end the relationship, they can come up with all kind of excuses. The entry on having a successful relationship is basically what i believed in, but what did i get out of it? Painful memories. I dare to say that i myself is a human being, i do make mistakes at times, i admit those mistakes and try not to make them again. she says that when she needs me i am not there for her, how am i suppose to do that when, singapore and i am in australia? i been spending heaps of money on phone cards, calling her whenever i can, trying to assure her that i am there for her, seems like it is not enough,i have been clinging on for as long as i could, and even at the start of the relationship,she has been saying that she wants a break up, for as long as i can remember, i clung on to this, shed tears to the point my eyes hurts and no more tears flows, every day, every month. all she says is that our character does not suit each other.
like i say, being in a relationship, we have to compromise, love each other for who we are, but to her, it just doesn't work. Easter holidays, i flew back to accompany her for 2 weeks, just wanted to make sure that she feels secure. Things were fine, but somehow, something was wrong. When i ask her what is wrong, she would say nothing, finally till the day when we are about to break up, she tells me, she is sick of hearing me asking what is wrong, she wants someone who can really understand her, someone who knows what is wrong with her just by looking at her.
Yes, her ex might have been able to do that, but i am not her ex, from my view point, she is just taking me as a sub,for companion, she has been comparing me and her ex since day 1. Everytime, she meets with a problem, she would call her ex first,instead of calling me. Giving me the reason that overseas phone call is expensive. Is that a valid reason? i have already spent so much on the phone bills just $10 more does not makes a difference, if she think calling me is expensive, why can't she just sent a sms to me, and i will call back.
this is just my point of view, of course, she will has her point of view, but right now, i just wanna find some place where i can just shout & yell until i lose my voice.
Now that all this has past, it is time to move on, it seems like all my previous entries has been dwelling on the past. I guess I am the one who couldn't let go.
Well the time has come to move along to my next phase of life and what will that be? Guess i will find out pretty soon :) EuGeNe â¥
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